NLP At Work : The Difference That Makes the Difference in Business

(Steven Felgate) #1
very likely file different sorts of information in their allocated
places. Even if you are not orderly about this, it is likely that
there is some method in your world. My son tells me that he
knows exactly where everything is in his bedroom!
We do the same with the space around us. You will have a
place in that space where you represent the past, the present,
and the future. Think about it now. Where are your past
memories: behind you, to one side, above you? Ask someone
close to you—you might be surprised to find that they have
their time zones allocated to very different parts of their
personal space.
It is as if we have a spatial filing cabinet that goes with us
wherever we go. We typically have a place for parts of ourselves
that we like and identify with and quite another space for the
parts of ourselves that we would prefer to dissociate from.
Often when I am coaching I note where these parts are
stored. I can gradually make the person I am coaching aware of
this storage system so they can make more choices in how
they use it. It is often the case that we keep the parts of
ourselves that we like close to our chest and the parts that we
don‘t like at arm’s reach in front or to one side of us. Watch
people’s hands and where they gesture as they speak to you
and you will learn where they store their memories, parts of
themselves, visions for the future, and much more.
We give clues about how we make decisions by where we
gesture. Think for a moment about how you make decisions.
How, for example, did you decide to read this book? Did you
have a choice of books or was its purchase part of a planned
approach and this was one step in a sequence? Whichever it
was indicates your preference for choices or procedures. And
if I had asked you to explain that choice to me, I wonder how
you would have indicated your preference in your body
language. Someone who prefers choice tends to wave their
hands in an arc in front of them indicating the array of choice
that lies before them. Someone whose preference is
procedural is much more likely to make a chopping action,
moving their hand away from them indicating the steps
stretching before them in sequence. British Prime Minister
Tony Blair frequently makes this chopping action during his
talks, indicating his sequential procedural thinking.

74 NLP AT WORK

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