Body Language Secrets A Guide During Courtship & Dating

44 BODY LANGUAGE SECRETS

IN THE BEGINNING
She's afraid of the same things you are—being
used, humiliated or rejected during courtship. She
has her pride, just as you do. She can't respond di-
rectly to your advances without risking rejection by
you. You could just be flirting or playing Cavalier. If
she comes back with openness and receptivity you
might laugh at her for taking you seriously.
To convince her you're safe, interesting and at-
tractive, you must be yourself, at your best, of
course.
To be successful, you must religiously follow the
Eleven Commandments Of Meeting. You can't break
even one!

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS OF^MEETING

I. Thou shalt not start out hard

II. Thou shalt not look at her breasts or buns

III. Thou shalt not mention the ex or children

TV. Thou shalt not look at other females

V. Thou shalt not talk over or down to her

VI. Thou shalt not be slick and smooth

VII. Thou shalt not be negative or cynical

VIII. Thou shalt not mention sex

IX, Thou shalt not ask about boyfriends

X. Thou shalt not touch, except to shake hands

XI. Thou shalt not reveal a standing interest in her.

To be successful, pay attention to what is being

said with, and without, words. Although the next

chapter is written principally for men, assertive

women can do the same things as the two of you

have your first Conversations Without Words.

So, thru the eyes, love attains the heart

For the eyes are the scouts of the heart

And the eyes go reconnoitering for

What it would please the heart to possess.

And when they are in full accord, firm

All in one resolve, at that time,

Perfect love is born from what the eyes

Have made welcome to the heart.

12th century troubadour's song

JOSEPH CAMPBELL, THE POWER OF MYTH

Just one look, that's all it took.

DORIS TROY, 1956

Conversations

Without Words

Most of us are slightly afraid as well as somewhat

excited in settings where social interaction is ex-

pected and required. So, most people do not sit or

stand in an open posture. But, during courtship, the

more open the other person's posture is, the more

open that person is to you and your advances.

OPEN AND CLOSED

If you're wide open while sitting, your posture is

similar to Abe Lincoln's in the Lincoln Memorial.

Your feet are flat on the floor. Your hands are re-

laxed, not clenching anything. And, you're not hold-

ing a drink in front of yourself as a symbolic barrier.

While standing, you're open when your hands are

not in your pockets. You are not leaning against

anything. Your feet are flat on the floor. And, your

drink is not in front of you.