The Dating Black book

(Dana P.) #1
© 2003 – Carlos Xuma. – DD Publications – All Rights Reserved –
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thought she was really asking about the gift and the party. By the end, even though he was
innocent, his confusion has put him on the defense. He was already well on the way to losing.


The best way I’ve found of handling questions is to always dig deeper before answering
and getting yourself into trouble. A guy’s reflex is to answer a question immediately, to be a
source of knowledge and answers. You have to curb this tendency and remember that women
rarely ask questions of you that are meaningless or trivial to them. When they do, they still
reserve the right to make their questions important and meaningful if they don’t like your
answer.
Here’s the Dynamic Method:


Todd was smart: He didn’t answer questions directly until he found out what was really
going on with Joanie. He also knew when to return a question with a question along the way. As
a result, he found out what Joanie was really driving at, and he avoided getting confused and
put on the defense.
Take every question with a grain of salt, and be safe in assuming there might be more
going on below the surface.


OVERREACTING (MORE ABOUT WHY MOMMY ISN’T MAD ....) ....................................................................


There is a specific test a woman will administer to you and your confidence. It’s one of
her many tests, and this one is meant to see if you’re really a confident, controlled man, or just
another wimp she will be able to dominate.
First of all, let me start off by repeating our well-known but not so well understood rule
that you must internalize and comprehend:


The one who cares the least controls the relationship.

Think about it. In every relationship you’ve been in where the woman was a needy,
hopelessly infatuated partner, what was your interest like? It probably didn’t need to get too
high, because her interest carried you both. Her low self-esteem probably incited her to make
every overture of romance to you that she could come up with. Notes. Gifts. Phone calls at all


Joanie: “Do you think I should bring a gift to Amy’s party?”
Todd: “Why do you ask?”
Joanie: (sighing) “I don’t know. I thought her gift was ugly. Did you like it?”
Todd: “It sounds like you weren’t happy about the party in general.”
Joanie: “It wasn’t all that fun.” (glaring) “It looked like you were having a lot of fun, though.”
Todd: “Why do you say that?”
Joanie: (shrugs) “I don’t know. It’s just ... well, I just saw you talking with Amy a lot. Do you think
she’s pretty?”
Todd: “Are you worried that there was something going on?”
Joanie: (looking sheepish) “Well, I was pretty jealous of how you spent all that time talking to
her.”
Todd: (hugging Joanie) “Don’t worry. I was watching you the whole time. You looked pretty hot in
that dress you were wearing.”
Joanie: (smiling) “Really?”
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