© 2003 – Carlos Xuma. – DD Publications – All Rights Reserved –
Unauthorized duplication or distribution is strictly prohibited. Visit http://www.datingdynamics.com for more information.recognizing that you are entirely separate from all other people. What you say doesn’t “make”
anyone feel bad or good about themselves; it’s what they choose to think about it.
Cindy blamed Paul instead of recognizing that she was only reacting to him. Just
because a person says something about you (“You’re stupid,” “You’re a slut,” “You’re a jerk”)
doesn’t mean that it’s true. They are only words. Don’t define yourself through another person’s
eyes, and don’t let them define themselves by what you say. Who you are does not include
another person’s thoughts or feelings about you.
Men often get caught up in dysfunctional relationships where the woman only sees
herself through the man’s eyes and opinion, and these are slippery slopes to set up a
relationship. Beware of the woman with unhealthy boundaries and who makes you responsible
for the way she feels about herself.
No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.JEALOUSY...............................................................................................................................................
The green-headed monster is probably more responsible for dating problems than any
other issue. It’s actually the easiest to understand, and can be overcome – if you pay attention
to the Truth and don’t read into the meanings of too many of her actions.
Jealousy is a lack of self-confidence, which then leads to a lack of self-discipline. That’s
all there is to it. Jealousy is usually 99% imagined, and the truly sad part is that it is usually a
self-fulfilling prophecy. The men who do not behave jealously end up intriguing women more,
because they see a man who is in control and doesn’t have a need to control her. The men who
do act crazy and jealous are flattering for about the first five seconds, and then the woman
figures out that this guy is going to be watching her every move, smothering her and controlling
everything she does. And behind it all, she wonders what he’s so scared of? Then his behavior
actually pushes her away and into the arms of another man, just what he was afraid of the
whole time.
Jealousy is best controlled through understanding and giving yourself options. Jealousy
is the fear that you are about to lose something, and a feeling of inadequacy or insecurity at
having had it in the first place. You give yourself options by continuing to date other people
along the way. You won’t fear the loss of one prospect if you have many other buyers beating
down your door to get your product.
A self-confident man with self-discipline works to improve his skills with women,
engaging and attracting them. Through successful repetition, he learns that he never needs to
fear the loss of any particular woman when he knows he can get another. He won’t smother or
attempt to control her, and this freedom and space he gives her actually increases her desire to
be with him.
LoserBoy: She’s probably out
with another guy... I bet he’s got
something you don’t.