© 2003 – Carlos Xuma. – DD Publications – All Rights Reserved –
Unauthorized duplication or distribution is strictly prohibited. Visit http://www.datingdynamics.com for more information.Step 3: Do what you must do
In the end, your final goal is to walk up to a woman and start talking to her, knowing
you’ll ask for the phone number. There will always be a twinge of anxiety when you do it, but
after a while that buzz will be what you look for, the same way an adrenaline junkie gets his fix
off of taking wild risks. You have to train your nervous system to love that little charge you get
when you step off into the unknown of a new encounter. I’ve found that it gets to be pretty fun,
and the positive responses outweigh the negative ones by about ten to one.
You must learn to eventually flirt with every woman you meet. When you can do this,
you’ve arrived. Every time you interact with a woman, you are practicing.
It’s really not that complicated, when you get down to the fundamentals.The secret in approaching a woman with the intent of getting her phone number is to do
it in such a way that you sneak under the usual defenses. Here’s the scoop:
Women are approached all the time, sometimes by guys they would like to meet again,
sometimes not. Most guys come up to a woman and either come on too strong or too weak. In
either case, she knows they are coming on to her, and she switches on her factory-equipped
defense mechanism against dweebs. Once she knows you are interested in her, she has to
figure out if she’s interested in you. And, she’ll start a whole mental chain of thinking – all of
which comes back to a gut instinct reaction of: “Uh-oh ...”
You want to avoid her switching on this mechanism, at least until you’ve got your foot in
the door. You don’t want to start the “Here comes another guy who’s interested in me” pattern.
You want to approach from a different angle. It’s like she is a jet fighter who has gotten so
skilled at the same initial attack vectors. No matter who the opponent is, she will roll and evade
out of habit – even if she’s interested.
What’s your angle? You approach her as a man who is different from all the others. First
of all some don’ts:
- Don’t start in with a compliment, unless it’s unique, genuine, and about something
that does not have to do with her body appearance. Try her shoes, or her jewelry. (If
she’s very attractive, never start with a compliment about her looks.) - Don’t start in with any embarrassing lines, like: “Hey, do you believe in love at first
sight, or should I walk by again?” - Don’t stare at her breasts or body. Keep your eyes locked on her face and eyes.
Also, remember that a woman in a public setting (especially alone) has more defenses
engaged. She might flick that switch on her defenses on sight, and it will take several well-
targeted missiles to bring down her plane. You have to be a little persistent to break through.
That’s part of her defense mechanism. If you give up on the first try, she doesn’t feel any loss,
because you didn’t really show that you had the balls to be different than the rest of the guys
who quit too soon.
See Her Approach/Flirt Get Phone No. Get Dates Sex/Relationship ?