Chapter 14: Smooth Running below Decks 227
Oliver is a very successful business school graduate who had his career
mapped out. He knew what he wanted to achieve and the time scales in which
he would meet his goals. He was thrilled when he was promoted to his dream
job as Vice President of Planning and Strategy in a major global corporation.
Just as he was about to embark on a tour of the European sites, disaster
struck. Oliver started waking up in the night with heart palpitations, breath-
lessness, and cold sweats. His doctor confirmed that nothing was physically
wrong with Oliver.
In talking through possible reasons for his condition with his NLP coach,
Oliver identified several issues connected with the promotion: he would
be away from home for longer periods; he would be living in hotels; and he
would be spending less time playing sport, something he was passionate
about. Oliver and his coach explored each of the layers of objections that
were presented and discarded them as superficial reasons for his health
issues.During a state of deep relaxation, Oliver recalled a memory of, in his words,
‘failing’ at maths as a young boy. Oliver’s teacher and parents had very high
expectations of Oliver and he felt that he’d let them down when he didn’t
meet the stringent exam standards. Oliver realised that, although the promo-
tion gave him the opportunity to work at his ideal job, it was very high profile
and his unconscious mind was trying to protect him from the humiliation
of yet another failure. To do so, it was creating the physical problems that
would ultimately get in the way of Oliver succeeding at his dream job.By working with his NLP coach, Oliver realised that his parents and teacher
had pushed him beyond his level of capability and set him up for failure.
Oliver recognised that he had succeeded at his career on the merits of his
abilities and he had what was necessary to be an outstanding success. He
discovered that making mistakes and encountering failure was all right, as
long as he was flexible enough to learn from the setbacks and use the lessons
positively to move forward.While achieving what you want in your career or a project close to your heart,
you may hit a brick wall. Find yourself a quiet space and some time to explore
the ways in which you may be creating barriers to your own success.Help! I’m in Confl ict with Myself
Self-sabotage is one of the symptoms you can experience when different con-
scious and unconscious parts of you are in conflict, where every attempt you
make to reach a goal is subverted by one of the parts. We detail two of the
most common methods of self-sabotage you need to keep an eye out for in
this section.