Chapter 8. Don’t break bad habits
Focusing on breaking bad habits creates resistance and uses up energy. As soon as
you start thinking, “I mustn’t do xyz...,” the first thing your brain does is bring up a
picture of you doing exactly that. The brain can’t find a picture of you not doing the
act – so you have to decide on a picture that the brain can use. It’s more beneficial to
use up that energy creating a new habit to replace an aspect of your old habit.
If, for example, you’re a smoker: Instead of using up all your energy trying NOT to
smoke all day, rather focus on replacing the first cigarette of the day with a better
option. If the first thing you do in the morning is reach for the cigarettes next to your
bed, replace that action with something else. Don’t worry about the rest of the day
(and the smoking) until you’ve established a strong new habit for that first moment
in the morning. Let’s say you decide to create a short morning routine that puts you
in a calm state of mind. Your routine could be:
Have a good stretch as you lie in bed.
Get up and sit in a chair.
Spend a few moments in gratefulness for your life.
Decide on your most important task of the day (if it’s weekend, choose a
non-work important task like doing something for yourself or your
partner).
Visualise yourself achieving that using all your senses.
Stand up, open the curtains and windows.
How do you turn this into a habit? According to Dr Maxwell Maltz it takes 21 days to
create a new habit. It has to be 21 days in a row – so you’ll have to start again if you
skip a day. Then there are ways to make the habit even stronger: do it at the same
time every day and include all your senses.
In the example above, make sure that you use all your senses when you visualise
your new habit. You could put a comfortable and colourful cushion on your chair,
place a few drops of lavender on your pillow and listen to the sounds of the birds or
the city as you think about things for which you’re grateful. Make sure you keep your
emotional state calm and peaceful throughout the exercise.
When you decide to create a new habit, consider what it’ll do to your motivation
levels. The new habit should leave you in a state of readiness for the day. You want
to create habits that leave you feeling motivated about your life.