The Sunday Times May 1, 2022 15A Star Wars-themed ride at Disney World,
left; Rosamund and Eden, pictured below,
spotted alligators, above, while on a boat
tour of the Everglades; by the pool at
Margaritaville Resort Orlando, bottomfree. We could sit while they played
outside with board games and in a
playground. Each night, they gathered
around a communal campfire cooking
marshmallows under pointillism stars.
Each morning, they took a quizzical look
at the buffalo grazing in an adjacent field
and wondered which had the biggest
bum. Sure, we should have gone to a shop
first and bought at least one vegetable,
given that the produce on sale was
generally yellow and fried. And, yes, quite
a few activities were shut. But this was
where we are most likely to stay again.
We ended at the Legoland
Pirate Island hotel, back
towards the airport and at
the park of the same name,
celebrating ten years of
brick-based rides. Because,
where else would you take
overexcited kids the day
before a night flight, than
accommodation decorated
like a child’s bedroom with lifts
that go “Arrr!”?
Thing is, something strange happened
there. Over dinner, in the restaurant
called Shipwreck, we were left alone, as
Ezra and Eden played in a room of Lego.
In the morning in the room, they again
played with Lego. Over breakfast, Lego.
It was like finally being on date with my
wife, who by this point was wearing an
eye patch.
This was the biggest blend of thrill
and chill we found. Who knew? In a hotel
designed for adults, you always think
about how to stop your child from being
bored. But in a hotel that looks like it was
drawn by the sillier pupils in year three,
the building becomes a nanny and you,
ironically, get an adult holiday.
Rosamund and I had an uninterrupted
chat. We did Wordle. We barely
mentioned the bad thing and talked for
the final time about our holiday, two
years after we first mentioned it. It felt
like a good idea back then. By the time
it happened, it was more important than
we could have imagined.Jonathan Dean and family were guests of
Visit Florida (visitflorida.com). America
As You Like It has a ten-night family
package to Florida in August from £11,180
for two adults and two children (aged 2-10).
Price includes return flights, ten days’ car
hire, stays at Margaritaville Resort
Orlando, the Boca Raton, Westgate River
Ranch Resort & Rodeo, and Legoland
Florida Resort’s Pirate Island hotel
(including park tickets); plus a Boggy Creek
Airboat Nature Tour and Kennedy Space
Center Visitor Complex tickets (americaas
youlikeit.com). Fourteen-day tickets to
Disney World from £459pp, if booked before
August 31 (disneyholidays.co.uk). For more
see experiencekissimmee.com; thepalm
beaches.com; and visitcentralflorida.orgstructural. It has several pools, a golf
course, a white-sand beach with
child-high waves and a level of service
that shows why Americans are always
tipping people.
Palm Beach County stretches from the
town of Jupiter down to Boca Raton and
is colourful and relaxed. The area is
called America’s First Resort Destination
because it has been attracting tourists
from colder climates for 125 years.
Wherever you look, you tend to see the
ocean. It is the sort of place where, in
picturesque Delray Beach, they close
the streets at the weekend for an
art market.
But kids don’t care about
art — they need food and
the hotel has the variety
of a food court in settings
that are far nicer. Sadelle’s
has a grand, airy feel
somewhere between New
York and Paris and is best for
brunch; Marisol is a beach
place with Greek food and a
breeze; Flamingo Grill is opulent, with
steaks and a bright-pink door. It is a hotel
of simple ideas done very well. One of
the pools has two water slides, the size
of which you tend to only get in water
parks, which amused Ezra for hours
— a rare time on holiday with children
when you can just lie down and let them
get on with it.
Frankly, Rosamund and I would have
just stayed there. Maybe finish a book.
Visit the spa. Take our pompelmo cocktail
(gin, tarragon, grapefruit, lemon) on an
afternoon walk in the surf. Sadly, though,
the children were still with us. They seem
to need us to pay for stuff and think of
things to do.
As such, we visited the Gumbo Limbo
nature centre, where injured sea turtles
go to feel better. Eden laughed at a puffer
fish while Ezra and Rosamund walked to
a sheltered cove and sat on a bench, to
stare out at the passing boats filled with
the local rich kids partying the weekend
away. She looked at ease, as if this part
of Florida was not just where the turtles
go to be well again.
Ask Ezra where his favourite place all
holiday was, though, and he will say, “The
Westgate River Ranch!” How to describe
it? A vast stretch of Wild-West-themed
outdoors in the middle of nowhere in
central Florida, where the nearest store
is a 20-minute drive away and, on site,
you can try anything from catch-and-
release fishing to a climbing wall via
horse riding and mini golf. We stayed
for two nights, in a glamping wagon
with significantly better features than the
original pioneers were used to. It was not
all comfort though — we were about 20ft
from a river in which the kids spotted
two alligators. Florida!
But no wonder they loved it. They wereCHILL
We were about
20ft from a river
in which the
kids spotted two
alligatorsBeachside at Boca Raton, Palm Beach CountyCAITLYN MCCABE/DISNEY; STEPHEN SEARLE, GEORGE OSTERTAG/ALAMY; STAN DZUGAN/GETTY IMAGES; JONATHAN DEAN