32 http://www.business-spotlight.de 2/2014Show that you are a good
TIP 8 listener
Just as you observe others, they will
be watching you as a listener. From
time to time, check how you are
standing or sitting. What are your
hands doing? Are you maintaining
eye contact appropriately? Are you
smiling or nodding? We shouldn’t be-
come paranoidabout our behaviour
as listeners and lose authenticity. But
we should remember that listening is
hard work and that our body lan-
guage often betraysirritation, confu-
sion or boredom far more clearly
than we imagine. As a rule of thumb,
if you are thinking it, your body lan-
guage is probably showing it.Stay in the other person’s
TIP 9 world
A funny thing happens when people
start talking to us. Their words and
stories spontaneously kick offa won-
derful world of imagination and ex-
perience in our own heads. Someone
mentions a trip to Dubai, and sud-
denly, we are thinking about our last
holiday there. We remember the
warmth of the sun and the sound of
the beach, and we start to recallthat
delicious dinner by the... And of
course, by this time, we have stoppedlistening. Although it is important to
exchange shared experiences in order
to build rapport, we should first stay
focused on the world of others and
ask questions that help them to talk
about their world, their lives and their
experiences:
nWhat were you doing in Dubai?
nHow did you find it?
nWhat did you learn about the culture?
nWhen are you going back?Prove that you have been
TIP 10 listening
Many conversations are “collective
monologues”, with people standing
in front of each other, projectingtheir
own worlds and not listening or con-
necting. One simple technique to cre-
ate a true dialogue when it is your
turn to speak, is to talk about some-
thing that you were just told. You can
signal this with phrases such as:
nJust picking up onwhat you said ear-
lier, I also think that...
nTo add to what you mentioned about
exporting to China,...
nI had a similar experience when I was
in Russia.
nI found Malta quite similar to the way
you describe it...It is not only essential that we listen
more effectively, but also that others
feel we are listening well. Ask for
feedback on your listening skills from
three key people in or outside your
organization. Start with a simple
question: “Do you think that I am a
good listener?” You may find it diffi-
cult to listen to the replies. But that in
itself can be an important part of the
answer — and gi ve you your first
chance to put into practice what you
have learned from this article.betray sth. [bi(treI] etw. verraten
catch sth.[kÄtS] etw. mitkriegen
get sth.[get] ifml. etw. mitbekommen,
kapieren
kick sth. off [)kIk (Qf] etw. in Gang setzen
maintain sth. etw. (aufrecht)
[meIn(teIn] erhalten
nod[nQd] nicken
paranoid [(pÄrEnOId] wahnhaft; hier:
ständig in Sorge
pick up on sth. etw. aufgreifen
[)pIk (Vp Qn]
project sth. etw. (nach außen)
[prE(dZekt] darstellen
recall sth. sich etw. ins Ge-
[ri(kO:l] dächtnis zurück-
rufen
rule of thumb Faustregel
[)ru:l Ev (TVm]BUSINESS SKILLS LISTENING MauritiusWhat if you don’t understand?
If you don’t understand what the other person or people are saying,
here are a number of useful phrases that you can use:
nI’m sorry, I didn’t understand/get/catchthat.
nI’m sorry, could you say that again, please?
nI’m sorry, could you repeat that, please?
nI’m sorry, could you speak a bit more slowly, please?
nDid I understand correctly? You’re saying that...Do an exercise on this topic on
Business Spotlight Audio
You can find related exercises in
Business Spotlight plus
Watch our “Business with Bob” series
of videos for more tips on how to
improve your communication skills:
http://www.business-spotlight.de/videos/bobpluswwwBOB DIGNENis a director of York As-
sociates (www.york-associates.co.uk),
and author of many books. Contact:
[email protected]Don’t just listen: show
you are listeningIn the next issue
In the next part of our series, Bob
Dignen provides ten top tips for im-
proving your speaking skills.nBS
28-32 Business Skills mainB 2_14gruen 16.01.14 15:44 Seite 32