A date with Sarah-Kate
PICTURES:BAUERSTUDIO.Kate’s home truths
T
ravellingbetween
Aucklandand
Dunedinwhilethe
Gingerhasbeen
workingthereover
thepastthreemonthshas
hadtwomajorimpacts.My
loveoftheOtagocityand
itssurroundshasvastly
increased,butsotoohasmy
loathingofairports.The
formeris a goodthingthat
givesmethewarmfuzzies,
thelatteris a first-world
problem,butthenI livein
thefirstworld,sothat’sOK.
Fora start,justgettingtoan
airportis possiblyevenmore
stressfulthesedaysthanbeing
atone.InAuckland,thetraffic
canplayhavocwithallthe
best-laidplans,meaningthe
onlysafethingtodois leavean
hourearly,whichthensucks
upanextrachunkofyourday.
As does having to queue todropoffyourbag.AmI rightin
thinkingthepointofreplacing
humansatcheck-inwith
machineswastosavetime?So
whyarehumansnowdirecting
frustratedflierswhohave
alreadycheckedthemselves
inwhiletheycongaaround
Departuresjusttoputtheir
suitcasesona conveyerbelt?
Lessonlearned:don’ttry
flying“Koruhour”inthe
morningjusttogetyourfree
pint-sizedbreakfastmuffin
becauseAucklandAirport’s
a zoothen.
Attheotherendofthe
country,DunedinAirport
neverseemstohaverush-
hourissues,butit is located
ina lovelyruralflatspot
thatseemstohavespecial
magneticpropertieswhen
it comestofog.
Forthisreason,I’vespent
more time at Dunedin AirportthanI everintended.Enough
togivemeanextremeallergy
tomenwhotalkworktoo
loudlyontheirphones.The
conversationsI’veborne
witnessto!Buildingsupply
hiccupsinChina,“Annette”
needingtopullhersocksup
orthere’dbeconsequences,
andmeetingpostmortems
withtheblameflyingfaster
thanyouraverageAirbus.
Andthevolume!People,
pleaseuseyourinsidevoices
whenyouareshreddingyour
colleague’scharactersor
bollockingsomepoorschmoe
inlogisticswhileina public
place.Therestofusdon’t
caretoknowtheinner
machinationsofyourwork
life,butwedolikea bitof“do
untoyourselfasyouwoulddo
untoothers”,sokeepit onthe
downlowandkeepit seemly.
My friend Jo actually tellsairportfoghornstosticka sock
init,butI’mnotcuteenoughto
getawaywithsuchsuggestions.
Andmyhairyeyeball,oft-
employedinthesesituations,
seemstohavelittleimpact.As
doesmyharrumphing,perhaps
becauseI amtryingnottodoit
tooloudly.
Beforecellphones,I guess
youjustreada magazineand
ateyourbarleysugars.Actually,
I stilldobothofthosethings
butthenI don’thavebuilding
suppliesinChinaorAnnettein
accounts,somyairportphone
callsif theyhappenatalltend
tobe“No,it’sjustbeendelayed
anotherhalfhour”or,“Hmm,
letmethink– chicken?”
Whatthehey,I’monly
onestepawayfromwearing
ear-plugs24/7likea proper
oldgrumpypersonanyway,
somaybeI’lljust fast-track
the process.I
wasinterestedto
readthatsupermodel
NaomiCampbellis a
germophobe.Asinshe
can’thandleeventhe
thoughtofgerms.She
revealedthatshegetson
planeswitha surgicalmask,
latexglovesandwetwipes.
Shethenproceedstowipe
downtheseat(frontand
back),thetraytable,theTV
screen– thelot.
Shedoesn’tcarewhat
peoplethink;she’smore
interestedinherhealthand
wellbeing.I feellikea kindred
spiritwithherthere.
I, too,amterrifiedofgetting
sick.I workina “hotdesk”
newsroomandsharedstudio
space,soI arriveatworkoften
tothepersonfromthenight
before’scold,half-drunkcup
ofcoffee,bitsofrubbishandgoodnessknowswhatgerms
onthekeyboard.
It’swinter,everyoneis sick
andI’mdeterminednotto
catchanything,soI toostart
myshiftwithwetwipes.
I cleanthecomputer
keyboard,desk,mouseandI
cleartherubbish.Thenwhen
I gothroughtothestudio,I
dothesamethingaswellas
cleanallthebuttonsweuse
onourradiodesk.
MyOCDhusbandtakesit
onestepfurther– heactually
vacuumsthefloorandempties
alltherubbishbinsandwipes
downthestudiodoors.Heis
nextlevel.Butsofar,sogood...
touchwood...neitherofusare
sick.Whichis weirdgivenour
kidsaredroppinglikeflies.
Sofarthiswinterwe’vehad
threelotsofstrepthroat,one
pneumonia, two flu viruses,twochestinfectionsandallfive
kidshavehadcolds.
Here’stheproblemwith
mygermophobia,though...it
grindstoa haltwhenit’smy
ownfamily’sbugs.Whenkids
aresick,asa mother,youjust
assumenaturalimmunity.
Eitherthatoryousimplyforget
inthemomenttobotherwith
allthewet-wipingandsluicing
downofsurfaces.
You’retoobusyhandingout
cuddlesorqueueingatA&E
(anotherhotbedofgerms),or
makinglemonandhoney
drinks.Yougetimmersedin
a housefullofillhealthand
barelyregisterit,yetwhen
yougotoworkandsomeone
sneezes,youduckforcover.
Whyis that?
Dowehaveourguardsup
morearoundstrangers’germs
than those of our own fleshandblood?I’mnotsurewhy
because,actually,we’remore
likelytogetsickfromsnuggling
a snottychildwho’scoughing
onusthanwearewalkingpast
a sneezingcolleague.
Eitherway,it’sa miracleI’m
notsickandI hopeinwriting
thiscolumnI’mnotjinxingit.
ButI dowanttotakemyhat
offtoNaomiforbeingopen
andhonestaboutthefactshe
hatesgerms.
PerhapsI shouldtake
upwearinga surgicalmask
aroundoursickchildren?
Orwet-wipingthemdown
everytimetheytouchme?
Butsomehowit justnever
happens.
Beinga parentmeansbeing
ontapforsickkids,likeit or
not.Let’sjusthopespringrears
itsheadsoonsothatgerm
season can take a back seat.Kate’s bugged bythe latestgerms doing therounds
WIPE IT OUT!
S a rah-Katewantsfliers tocheck-in theirmanners
FLIGHT PLAN
68 Woman’s Day