140 • JULY 2019
FUN & GAMES
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A BURGLAR BROKE INTO A HOUSE
in the middle of the night. He shined
his torch around, looking for
valuables, when a voice in the dark
said, “Jesus knows you’re here.”
The thief nearly jumped out of his
skin, clicked his torch light off, and
froze. When he heard nothing more,
he shook his head and continued.
Moments later, clear as a bell he
heard the words again, “Jesus is
watching you.”
Startled, he shined his light around
frantically, looking for the source of
the voice. Finally, in the corner of the
room, he saw a pet parrot.
“Did you say that?” he hissed at
the parrot.
“Yes”, the parrot confessed, then
squawked, “I’m just trying to warn
you that Jesus is watching you.”
The burglar relaxed. “Warn me,
huh? Who in the world are you?”
“Moses,” replied the parrot.
“Moses?” the burglar laughed.
“What kind of people would name
a bird Moses?”
“The same kind of people who
would name a pit bull Jesus,” the
parrot replied. SEEN ON REDDITAS I HANDED MY FATHER HIS 80th
birthday card, he looked at me with
tears in his eyes and said, “You know,
one would have been enough.”
SEEN ON TWITTERDogs With Jobs
These puppies are on shift K9 till
5, working hard to make their
humans’ lives that little bit easier.
(via boredpanda.com)