Birthday Cantatatata ...
One fine May day, the Tortoise and Achilles meet, wandering in the woods.
The latter, all decked out handsomely, is doing a jiggish sort of thing to a
tune which he himself is humming. On his vest he is wearing a great big
button with the words "Today is my Birthday!"Tortoise: Hello there, Achilles. What makes you so joyful today? Is it your
birthday, by any chance?
Achilles: Yes, yes! Yes it is, today is my birthday!
Tortoise: That is what I had suspected, on account of that button which
you are wearing, and also because unless I am mistaken, you are
singing a tune from a Birthday Cantata by Bach, one written in 1727
for the fifty-seventh birthday of Augustus, King of Saxony.
Achilles: You're right. And Augustus' birthday coincides with mine, so
THIS Birthday Cantata has double meaning. However, I shan't tell you
my age.
Tortoise: Oh, that's perfectly all right. However, I would like to know one
other thing. From what you have told me so far, would it be correct to
conclude that today is your birthday?
Achilles: Yes, yes, it would be. Today IS my birthday.
Tortoise: Excellent. That'sjust as I suspected. So now, I WILL conclude it is
your birthday, unless-
Achilles: Yes-unless what?
Tortoise: Unless that would be a premature or hasty conclusion to draw,
you know. Tortoises don't like to jump to conclusions, after all. (We
don't like to jump at all, but especially not to conclusions.) So let me
just ask you, knowing full well of your fondness for logical thought,
whether it would be reasonable to deduce logically from the foregoing
sentences, that today is in fact your birthday.
Achilles: I do believe I detect a pattern to your questions, Mr. T. But
rather than jump to conclusions myself, I shall take your question at
face value, and answer it straightforwardly. The answer is: YES.
Tortoise: Fine! Fine! Then there is only one more thing I need to know, to
be quite certain that today is-
Achilles: Yes, yes, yes, yes ... I can already see the line of your question-
ing, Mr. T. I'll have you know that I am not so gullible as I was when
we discussed Euclid's proof, a while back.
Tortoise: Why, who would ever have thought you to be gullible? Quite to
the contrary, I regard you as an expert in the forms of logical thought,
an authority in the science of valid deductions, a fount of knowledge
about correct methods of reasoning ... To tell the truth, Achilles, you
are, in my opinion, a veritable titan in the art of rational cogitation.Birthday Cantatatata ... 461