Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man

dedicated husband and father. She also knew this man had to be
faithful, love God, and be willing to do what it took to keep
this family together. On a smaller scale, she also made clear that
she expected to be treated like a lady at every turn—I’m talking
opening car doors for her, pulling out her seat when she’s ready
to sit at the table, coming correct on anniversary, Mother’s Day,
and birthday gifts, keeping the foul talk to a minimum. These
requirements are important to her because they govern how she
will be treated; they are important to me, too, because they lay
out a virtual map of what all I need to do to make sure she gets
what she needs and wants. After all, it’s universal knowledge
that when mama is happy, everybody is happy. And it is my sole
mission in life to make sure Marjorie is happy.
Men can’t accomplish this mission for you without your
help; we can’t possibly begin to fathom what it is you women
need and want because your needs and wants change from
woman to woman like the wind does from city to city. Men are
very simple, logical people; if you tell us what you like and
what you don’t like, we’ll do anything we can to make sure we
live up to your expectations, particularly if we’re interested in
forging a relationship with you. (But beware of telling a man
everything you like when you first meet; I’ll tell you why later
in the chapter.)
But really, we’re not programmed to figure it out. It really
makes us quite happy when you lay out your requirements for
us. And we need you to do it up front, so we can decide if we’re