A man who is worthy of the benefits will be there for you no
matter what bad circumstance comes along. If you lose your job
or fall behind on some payments because you had a huge and
unexpected financial situation to deal with, he’ll recognize your
need for help and rise to the occasion, whether it’s giving you a
little extra cash to make the minimum payment on your bills,
stopping by with a few bags of groceries, or filling your gas
tank.
Let’s just get right to the crux of this whole chapter: when a
man asks for sex, and he is told no, his reaction to that no will
tell you everything you need to know about him. If the phone
calls cease or become infrequent, the flowers stop coming, the
dating slows down, please understand that this man was just in
it for the sex. If he says something stupid, such as, “I don’t need
to wait for sex—I can get it from anybody,” you tell him right
back, “Please do.” This cuts the riffraff away right away. But if
your saying no doesn’t deter him, and he continues to try to get
to know you better and prove to you that he’s worthy of your
benefits, then he’s really, truly interested in you. Don’t get me
wrong: he’s still interested in the sex. But he’s also interested in
knowing how you feel and what time frame you’re working on.
Then the relationship becomes about what you want—what
your needs are. And that’s what you’re after, right?