a note by the tree and send up smoke signals so the girl knew
what was up. Oh, the courtship was far more romantic, be-
cause the men knew they had to behave properly—not just for
their intendeds, but their intendeds’ daddies. The boys had to
go over to the house, ask permission to sit in the room to-
gether, and the adults were present because there weren’t any
extra rooms for them to sit in alone. And that courting culmi-
nated in the men pulling the fathers aside and, with their
shoulders squared and chins up, asking the fathers for their
daughters’ hands in marriage. And whatever the father said is
what went.
Now women have been taught all their lives that if a man
loves you, he will court you and ask for your hand in marriage.
The problem with this is that you’ve been trained to use
twentieth- century logic in twenty-first-century situations.
There’s no slim pickings of women out here—women are at
every turn, working with men, living in apartment buildings
with them, riding the bus and trains with them, hanging out at
the clubs with them. Technology’s such that you can contact a
woman without ever even seeing her. It’s not 1945 anymore—
you can’t hang on to those old ways. This, “If he wants to
marry me, he’ll ask me” thing has got to stop. Because we’re
not going to ask you when you’re ready—we’re going to play
with you until you give us your requirements and standards,
and stand by them. I’m not telling you to get on bended knee.
I’m telling you to set a timeline for the ring and the date, and
tell the man you want to be married to what it is.
singke
(singke)
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