either correct and discipline using the means of the rod and
communication, or you will inevitably fall back on one of the
methods we rejected in Chapter 7. Some parents succumb to bribing,
making contracts, using behavior modification, making heavy
emotional appeals, grounding their children, etc. There are no parents
that do not train. All parents train in some way. The problem is that
much of it is poor training.
The “Why” of Spanking
(^) The “why” is that God commands it. Additionally, spanking
enables you to deal with issues of the heart. Remember, the heart
directs behavior. Discipline addresses the heart. It does not focus on
behavior alone.
(^) Bad behavior represents a failure to obey and is, therefore, the
occasion for correction—but the focal point of correction is not
behavior. The focal point is the heart of the child that is called to
submission to God’s authority. The goal of correction is not simply to
modify behavior, but to bring the child to sweet, harmonious, and
humble heart submission to God’s will that he obey Mom and Dad.
The heart is the battleground. The spanking comes only because it is
God’s method of driving foolishness far from your child’s heart.
(^) While you have an eye on the here and now, you know that there is
more at stake. Where will your child be 30 years from now if no one
ever challenges his determination to do whatever he wants whenever
he wants? What kind of husband will he be if he refuses to submit to
God’s rule? What kind of employee will he be if he never learns to
submit to authority?
(^) Where will your grandchildren be 50 years from now if the
foolishness bound up in your child’s heart is never driven away? How
will your child ever see his need of Christ’s forgiveness and grace if
he never faces the native rebellion of his nature and his inability to
obey God from the heart?