PEARL 32

Professional Help: When to Seek It

Adelicate question often arises from parents of troublesome children:

“When should we seek professional help?” First, get it out of your head
that seeking professional help is an admission of failure. In our complex
society, with its myriad social problems, our kids quite naturally face
dilemmas we never had to cope with during our childhood. Societal
pressures for success, for example, are overwhelming, filtering down
even to the lower grades. Peer pressure prompts kids to insist on the latest
designer jeans and the coolest brand-name sneakers — when they’re still
in kindergarten! More kids than ever before have severe problems, and
the causes of those problems stand apart from the method or intent of
parental discipline.
Thus, we offer two guidelines for seeking professional help:

1. If you have read this book — taking in the Love and Logic
   philosophy and applying it consistently to your children — and you
   still have big problems, then you need professional help.


2. If a situation has gotten progressively worse over a three-month
   period and no improvement is in sight, you should seek out a
   counselor.

Professional care does not necessarily mean a long, drawn-out series of
counseling sessions. Oftentimes, one session with a trained counselor
who knows what he or she is talking about is enough to straighten out the
problem.