family, she related her disappointment that she didn’t learn about Love
and Logic when her children were younger. “I’m sure the fantasy world
of the games had a lot to do with the fact that they provided an illusion of
control for a boy who had too few choices and consequences in his real
life. He was denied the opportunity to feel needed in our family. This
happened when we gave up on trying to get him to do his fair share of the
work around the house. The reason we gave up was because we didn’t
know how to get him to do chores without constant reminders and battles.
I now know that Jared has an addictive personality that made it easy to
slip into the gaming addiction as a way of replacing what he was not
getting out of his family life. I’m sure the odds of avoiding this problem
would have been much higher had we known and used the Love and Logic
process as we raised him.”
In summary, the issue of video games sometimes puts parents between
a rock and a hard spot. On the one hand, we want our kids to make their
own choices (for example, how much time they spend playing video
games). On the other hand, if they cannot make the correct choices, an
addiction could develop. The Love and Logic approach is to allow
children to make their own decisions unless their health is endangered.
Love and Logic parents encourage and counsel, just as would a good
therapist. However, with a true addiction, in which functioning is at risk,
the control battle may be worth the hassle. Certainly, though, many
parents handle the issue the simple way: From the time the children are
young, they simply do not have video games in the home. We applaud
those folks!
lu
(lu)
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