obnoxious, too rude, too aggressive, or too dangerous. Then make up
your mind that those behaviors are the ones that will be counted.
CautionYour kids already have their MBAs! Minor But Aggravating actions that may rub
you the wrong way but which are not really misbehavior. These may include
humming, squirminess, rolling the eyes, and eating the frosting off the top of the
cupcake first.But in the beginning with 1-2-3 Magic, don’t ignore genuine
misbehavior. In the beginning, when in doubt, count! After a while,
when you’re getting a good response at 1 or 2, you may be able to let
up a little.
Let’s say, for example, that after a few weeks getting used to the
1-2-3 program, your child does something right in front of you that
would normally be counted. Instead of counting right away, just
watch your kid. The child can almost “feel” the count coming.
Sometimes, if you say nothing, the child will spontaneously exercise
self-control and stop the misbehavior. This response is ideal, because
now the child is internalizing the rules and controlling himself
without direct parental intervention. Isn’t that the kind of person you
want to drop off at the dorm on the first day of his freshman year in
college?
How long do you take in between counts?
About five seconds. Just long enough to allow the child time to shape