STATE MY PATH 123"I can't believe you're doing this to me," she says in a painful
tone.
"Doing what?" Bob asks-not knowing what she's talking
about but figuring that whatever it is, it can't be good.
"You know what I'm talking about," she says, continuing to
keep Bob on edge.
"Do 1 need to apologize for missing her birthday?" Bob won
ders to himself. "No, it's not even summer and her birthday is on
... well, it's sweltering on her birthday. "
"I'm sorry, 1 don't know what you're talking about," he
responds, taken aback.
"You're having an affair, and 1 have proof right here!" Carole
explains holding up a piece of crumpled paper.
"What's on that paper that says I'm having an affair?" he asks,
completely befuddled because (1) he's not having an affair and (2)
the paper contains not a single compromising photo.
"It's a motel bill, you jerk. You take some woman to a motel,
and you put it on the credit card?! 1 can't believe you're doing
this to me!"
Now if Carole were certain that Bob was having an affair, per
haps this kind of talk would be warranted. It may not be the best
way to work through the issue, but Bob would at least understand
why Carole made the accusations and hurled threats.
But, in truth, she only has a piece of paper with some num
bers on it. This tangible piece of evidence has made her suspi
cious. How should she talk about this nasty hunch in a way that
leads to dialogue?
STATE MY PATH
I f Carole's goal is to have a healthy conversation about a tough
topic (e.g., I think you're having an affair), her only hope is to