then his need for his partner to look like his fantasy picture
subsides. The spell is broken when his heart opens and he feels
a special connection with his partner. This process takes time,
even if he is with the right person.
As long as a man has not experienced
the reality of making a woman happy,
he will hold a fantasy picture.In stage two, even if the grass on the other side of the fence
begins to look greener, the man’s new objective is to look and
dig a little deeper on his side of the fence, to stop looking at
the grass and dig for the gold. He may or may not find it, but
he will never find it if he doesn’t start digging.
To dig deeper he needs to ask himself these questions:
- Could I possibly be the right man for her?
- Could I possibly have what it takes to make her happy?
- Do I care for her?
- Do I want to make her happy?
- Does her happiness make me happy?
- Do I miss her when I am away from her?
When, over time, a man discovers an affirmative answer to
each of these questions, then he is ready to move on to an ex-
clusive relationship.
WHY MEN BEGIN TO DOUBT
When a man does not understand Venusians, he can make the
mistake of thinking he can’t make a woman happy. In reality
he may have the ability, but because he misinterprets the way
she thinks and feels he reaches a faulty conclusion.
48 / JOHN GRAY, PH.D.