Typical Questions of Married Couples and the AnswersAttitude
Q. He is not helpful and has an “I don’t care” attitude.
A. It is one of the duties of every husband to love his wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for it
(Ephesians 5:25). If a husband truly loves his wife, one of the things that he will do will be to protect her from the
strain of housework. What this means is that he will help and support his wife in order that she does not crush under
the weight of responsibilities she has to carry. (Refer to Chapter 11 pg. 43-47, “Duties of the Husband”).
The wife must also bear in mind that as a Christian wife her roles are many, so she must ask for help nicely from
her husband. Let him feel that you are appreciative of the little things he does around the house. Furthermore, even
if she does not agree with this, she must make the husband believe that she is grateful for his help at home with
domestic chores.
This approach massages the ego of the man and makes him want to do more. Resist the urge to bark out
instructions about who should do what and who should not do what.
(Refer to Chapter 8 pg. 28-30, “Love in Marriage––Agape”).
Q. She is not submissive.
A. It is the duty of wives to submit to their own husbands in all things (Ephesians 5:22). Being submissive
means to respect, yield, comply, and agree with. It is usually not very easy to do, but since it is a scriptural
requirement, wives must strive to obey it.
Husbands must however bear in mind that submitting to them becomes easier for wives when the husbands love
them as Christ loves the church.
Wives ought to know that submitting is not a weakness, but a sign of strength. A submissive wife is usually easier
to dwell with than a contentious, fighting wife.
(Refer to Chapter 12 pg. 49, “Duties of the Wife––Submit to Your Husband”).
Q. She is quick-tempered.
A. As leaders in the home, if a husband is dealing with a quick-tempered wife he must handle her as a weaker
vessel and as one who needs to be helped. As the head, love her and accommodate and teach her from the Word of
God and by your example.
Q. He does not show appreciation.
A. Again, it is the duty of every husband to make his wife feel happy at home. One can achieve this onerous
task by among other things, letting her feel accepted; refraining from being harsh and staying at home as often as
possible, and by being a companion.
In the absence of the above, it is not likely that any husband will have a contented wife to deal with. A husband
must not behave as if his wife’s sole preoccupation is to make him comfortable. Therefore, anything that she does
to make his life more comfortable should be seen as something worthy of commendation and appreciation. The more
he says “thank you”, the more service he is likely to receive.
(Refer to Chapter 11 pg. 43-47, “Duties of the Husband”).
Q. He does not stay at home often. He comes home late.
A. Is there a reason to believe that he goes to places where you suspect he may be having an affair or you are
just uncomfortable with his nocturnal activities? Trust is very important if your marriage is going to last or to be
harmonious and sweet. Suspicion is very unhealthy. “Love believes all things, hopes all things...” and “perfect love
casts away all fears”.
There must be opennenss about his movements to remove all doubts handle the issue in a way that does not
make it obvious that you are trailing him and are full of suspicion.
(Refer to Chapter 6 pg. 20, “The God-Type of Marriage––Openness”, Chapter 8 pg. 33-35, “Love in
Marriage––Agape”).