Scenario 3: The unflinching stare
You can grab the attention of an adversary by looking her directly in the eye
without flinching. Direct eyeball-to-eyeball staring can be deeply threatening.
If you’ve ever played the child’s game of stare-you-out you know that at some
point you, or your partner, breaks the contact because maintaining it is just
too difficult.My darling mother has an uncanny way of looking at a person straight in the
eye without batting an eyelid when she disapproves of what that person’s
doing. Her mouth tenses, her eyes narrow as they tighten around the edges,
and her gaze doesn’t falter. My sister, other selected family members, and I
have all experienced the stinging effect of this piercing gaze, lovingly referred
to as ‘The Look.’ It is unflinching, judgemental, and can reduce us to respond-
ing in one of two ways: We attempt to stare our mother down, which we have
yet to achieve, or else, unable to stand the pressure, we avert our eyes in a
downward glance. Either way, Mother wins.If someone’s trying to bully you or put you off, look your foe straight in the
eye, narrow your eyelids, and focus directly on your target. If other people
are around, let your eyes move slowly from one person to the next without
blinking. Move your eyes first and let your head follow, keeping your torso
still. The effect is unnerving. If you need a role model, Arnold
Schwarzenegger in The Terminatoris your man.Effective gazes in business situations ...............................................
If you want to come across as a person to be taken seriously keep your gaze
in the triangular area between the eyes and the centre of the forehead. As
long as your eyes remain in that space and you keep control of the interac-
tion the other person reckons that you’re someone who means business. The
following are other tricks that come in handy in business situations.Chapter 5: The Eyes Have It 81
The Evil Eye
The prevalent and powerful superstitious belief
in the Evil Eye comes from the feeling that
people can be damaged by a prolonged stare.
Belief in the Evil Eye is strongly held in
Mediterranean countries, even among sophis-
ticated people who often carry amulets and
other good-luck charms to ward off disasters.
Fishermen commonly protect their boats from
danger by attaching a pair of artificial eyes to
the prows of their vessels as a means of out-
staring a potential threat or enemy. This prac-
tice began in ancient Egypt and is active in
many parts of the world.