could have gone wrong in this scenario did. Franklin
exploded. Lamar exploded. My car exploded, forcing me
to steal another car which also exploded. At one point I
managed to shoot the rider off the bike, but both the rider
and the bike exploded, as by this point the Chaos Mod had
added another effect giving me exploding bullets.
Clearly the barrage counts as a long effect, and let me
tell you, 15 minutes is a long time in a videogame,
especially when that videogame has dedicated all its
resources to blowing you up. I begin to think it might be
impossible to complete this mission, when the Chaos Mod
introduces a third effect – bullet time. This new effect
does two things. Firstly, it makes driving through Los
Santos during an artillery strike look cooler than a
penguin wearing Ray Bans. Secondly, it makes weaving
through traffic much easier, enabling me to get to the bike
and shunt the driver off. I leap out of the car and clamber
onto the bike. Now to take it to safety without being killed.Unfortunately, alongside the Chaos Mod’s absurdity,
GTA’s regular systems remain very much in play, and
clipping another car as I turn a corner sends Franklin
flying across the asphalt. In addition, the police are on my
tail, believing that I’m somehow responsible for turning
downtown Los Santos into Verdun. Now I’m in a
treacle-speed gunfight with the cops while trying to make
my way back to the bike before it’s consumed by hellfire.
Somehow, I manage to take out the police in the
immediate area, clamber onto the bike and give the fuzz
the slip. By the time I arrive at my destination, both the
bombardment and the bullet-time have stopped, while
Franklin’s character model has vanished, making it appear
as if the bike is driving itself. Fair enough, to be honest. I
think I’d want to disappear up my own arse after going
through all of that as well.
Slowly, I make my way to the next mission. This is
partly because I need a break, and partly because theRAISING THE FUN BAR
The Chaos Mod is chaotic, but does it make the game more fun?properly from whatever the Chaos
Mod throws at me. That’s what my
idiot brain thinks about five seconds
before the world explodes.DEATH FROM ABOVE
There’s no other way to describe it.
All around me explosions start going
off, transforming a gang war into an
actual war. The Chaos Mod appears
to have triggered an artillery
bombardment, although I can’t know
for sure because, just before this, I
switched off the names of the effects
to stop them clogging up the screen. I
go through the alley to see the owner
of the bike ride off on it. Great, now I
have to chase him through the Blitz.
I’d like to say that I swiftly and
dashingly navigated the
bombardment and retrieved the bike
with ease. I did not. Everything thatFun ratingEffectSurprise
TugDeadly
AgentArtillery
BombardmentApe
CompanionPredator
Vision Box
VisionMurderous
Vehicles10
9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0Chaos Mod has disabled my ability to
move sideways, making it impossible
to drive. Indeed, it’s worth noting not
every effect the Chaos Mod throws at
me is spectacular, or even fun. One
spawns an ape that follows me
around, which is certainly odd, but
not exactly the height of anarchy. The
mod also has a propensity for
annoying screen effects, like a
high-contrast Predator vision and
reducing the visible display to a
square box that dances around my
screen. The worst effects, though, are
the ones that disable parts of your
controls. That isn’t chaotic, Chaos
Mod, that’s just mean.
I manage to complete the next
mission – which sees Michael take
revenge on the dealership for taking
advantage of his son – without
incident. I wonder if the Chaos Mod
is giving me a break, but instead it’s
merely biding its time. I exit the
dealership, and see a blimp float
down onto the buildings next to me. I
assume the mod has just spawned a
blimp, but then a helicopter does the
same thing. Is air-traffic falling out of118 MARCH 2021
PERSONAL ADVENTURES IN GAMES
DIARY
118
Time for a well earned rest.