© 2003 – Carlos Xuma. – DD Publications – All Rights Reserved –
Unauthorized duplication or distribution is strictly prohibited. Visit http://www.datingdynamics.com for more information.Most other men would change their opinions and their political party if they thought it would help
them get somewhere.
Once you get her to agree on the time and place, get off the phone! Anything else you
talk about now would only subtract value from the meeting you will have with her later. If you
keep talking, you will only give her more information about you, and thus reduce the amount of
mystery you will have. You want to give her more reason to see you rather than less.
What is the goal of this stage in your strategy? Right now, you are looking to answer a
single question:
Is she a candidate for my dating goal?
Keep in mind that this answer is either “MAYBE” or “NO” until she is actually fulfilling the
terms of your goal. Not before. You see, another big mistake both men and women make is to
think that, “Yes! This is The One!” just because a little chemistry and infatuation clouds their
judgment. There is no “YES” answer until much later.
For the first meeting, don’t plan a big date with flowers and dinner and a movie. You’ll
look like a simpering fool that is desperate for acceptance, and no woman will respect – or more
importantly, be attracted to – this kind of behavior. You are screening candidates for your job,
and this is just a glance at their resume. I don’t know about you, but I’d worry about a company
that put on a big production number to lure me in for a job. Women worry about that sort of
thing, too.
Plan to spend no more than $5 for this first introduction session. At least half of the first
meetings are disappointments, so for every four meetings you initiate, you save at least $140,
assuming around $40 a date – and that’s a cheap date. (I told you I’d save you time, heartache,
and money, didn’t I?) You learn more on inexpensive dates than you do on the big ones – such
as if she’s low-maintenance, and is she fun. If the date is expensive, you wind up forcing
yourself to feel more interested because you’re investing more.
Spend less, get more.
So just do a half-hour meeting with her at a local coffee shop. Make it interesting and
fresh sounding, not a chore, and if it really does get interesting, you can always extend the time
a little. You show up a couple minutes early to check the place out and get a seat, and you bring
something along to do. As I advised before, bring a book or a magazine. Don’t look like a needy
guy who’s just dying to be seen with a woman.
At five (5) minutes after the time when she said she’d be there, you order a cup of coffee
or tea on your own. So when she gets there, you’ve already demonstrated that you are capable
of making your own happiness in life. When she gets there, you ask her what she wants, order,
and pay.