© 2003 – Carlos Xuma. – DD Publications – All Rights Reserved –
Unauthorized duplication or distribution is strictly prohibited. Visit http://www.datingdynamics.com for more information.- An ability to know when to stop and step back. You should be prepared to ease
off on your advances if you’re not making positive progress. We need to revisit
Self-discipline again. The smart army, in the words of Sun Tzu, knows when to
fight and when not to fight:
If he can fight, he advances and takes the offensive; if he cannot fight, he
retreats and remains on the defensive. He will invariably conquer who
knows whether it is right to take the offensive or the defensive.- Relaxed, no rush atmosphere: Too many guys jump into the "Gotta get it while I
can" mode when they get the green light for sex. The thinking here is that you need
to get it before she changes her mind. Slow down! Take your time. If you please her
well enough, there’s almost no way she’ll stop or change her mind. - Planned and prepared: Have condoms. Any guy who thinks he can (or should)
engage in sex without protection is flirting with a possible pregnancy, disease, and
even death. Sure, it feels a lot better without a layer of latex between you, but you
can sacrifice the added pleasure for your health. Condoms are not an option
anymore. - Giving: Women are very concerned about your ability to please them (probably
because so few men know about where and how to touch them.) This anxiety
appears very prominently when you first go to bed with her. Something I’ve found
very interesting over the years: The best way to handle your first encounter with a
woman is to ensure that she gets hers first. Go down on her or have her guide your
hand in the best way to give her stimulation (requiring some of those communication
skills we discussed earlier.) After she’s hit Cloud 9, you can then take as long or as
short as you like, and she’s a lot more grateful. (Sometimes, though, she may be too
self-conscious to let herself go, an orgasm may be difficult.) - Awareness: You should always be aware and present enough during sex that you
aren’t missing clues on your performance. Don’t ignore indications that you might
need to alter your approach. - No anger or violence: The biggest fear of a woman is that she will be physically
harmed by a man. Allowing you to enter her body is a high statement of her trust. If
she is in enough lust, she will override that trust mechanism, but it only lasts for a
little while.
Also keep in mind that she doesn’t want to go through every position in your first night
together. You want to demonstrate you have a firm grip on the basics before you go catapulting
into complex body-twisting positions that would make a Chinese acrobat wince. Don’t presume
you’re going to get a " 69 " on your first time with her, though it could happen if she’s very open
and trusting in bed. You just need to spend your time attending to her needs. I have yet to find a
woman that won’t branch out and explore if she’s been made comfortable from the start.
LoserBoy: Woo-hoo!
Better hurry and get me
some!