up friendships. In her later years, freedom from
responsibilities to husband and children, and the
greater latitude allowed a post-menopausal woman,
enabled her to spend time with friends.
In the 1960s and 1970s, with more girls going to
school, and even a minority to university, and then
taking jobs, in Iran more so than in Afghanistan,
females found opportunities to make friends with
their classmates and work associates. Well-off fam-
ilies often participated in one or more circles of
people who met on a regular basis, weekly or
monthly, for food and conversation. Wealthier
women who were not working might take turns
hosting elaborate lunches. High school girls might
follow suit, their parents driving them to the home
of a classmate on a weekend for a good meal cooked
by the mother, and then a movie in the afternoon.
Even less educated and less economically advan-
taged women could participate in regular women’s
religious gatherings to listen to recitations of the
passion of Shì≠ìMuslim saints. Educated and mod-
ernized females in Iran and in the tinier middle- and
upper middle-class urban Afghanistan could develop
extensive networks outside religious and kin cir-
cles. Based more on specific common interests and
world-view rather than on proximity, such friend-
ships might last a long time, even after marriage. In
urban Iran, groups of couples could enjoy weekend
outings and eat out at restaurants together.
In Afghanistan, the war with the Soviet Union,
the conflict between factions after the expulsion of
the Soviets, and then finally the Taliban rule forced
many Afghans to become refugees. Friendships and
ties with family and relatives were disrupted. Often
Afghan women living as refugees away from their
own neighborhoods and villages in Afghanistan
faced severe seclusion. Under the Taliban, women
were not permitted to leave the house without a
male family member escort, and thus were cut off
from friends and relatives. Under the insecure con-
ditions of post-Taliban Afghanistan, families fear
for the safety of their females, and often do not
allow girls to go to school, or visit in other homes
without a male family escort, thus reducing oppor-
tunities to interact with friends.
In Iran, women met with friends to discuss per-
sonal and public issues. Women mobilized their
friends for various organizations and participation
in political marches for supporters of the revolution
against the Pahlavìregime. After the revolution and
the subsequent formation of the Islamic Republic
of Iran, the religious/political leaders mandated
increased gender segregation and women’s mod-
esty. In the early years of the republic, women were
iran and afghanistan 193restricted in their movements and activities and
were thus less able to maintain interaction with
friends outside religious and kin gatherings. How-
ever, after these early policies were modified, even
those from rural, lower-class and more conservative
families began to attend high school and university
in greater numbers, thereby gaining opportunities
to develop friendships outside the family. Women’s
segregated religious gatherings to study the Qur±àn
and other religious sources have increased in popu-
larity. Some women are working through their
friendship networks to try to bring about positive
change in women’s rights and opportunities.
In Afghanistan, women cooperated with friends
to try to form home-based, secret schools for girls
during the Taliban period and to oppose the severe
Taliban restrictions on females.
Those Iranian women, and the much smaller per-
centage of Afghan women, who work outside the
home have little time for intensive rounds of visit-
ing and attending religious ritual, neighborhood,
kin, and friendship group gatherings. However,
they continue to place great importance on social-
izing, intimate or intellectual exchange, and devel-
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