Vision and Values 57values are being disregarded? Part of being a leader is not
only wanting our own values met but also acting from them
and creating them for others – in their terms. Values are
captured in rather vague words like ‘recognition’, ‘friend-
ship’, ‘fulfilment’, ‘joy’, ‘love’, ‘commitment’ and ‘well-
being’, but behind these fluffy concepts lie real experiences
and they will be slightly different (sometimes very different)
for each of us. When we have these experiences, they let us
know that the value has been fulfilled. They are our reward.
Specific behaviour and experiences that we see, hear and
feel and that are evidence of our values are called ‘value
equivalents’ in NLP. There are four sorts of value equivalents:
- First, what do others have to do to meet your values?
Different people need very different evidence for the
same value. What one person regards as a fair salary, for
example, another would regard as a pittance and a third
regard as a fortune. For one person, competence means
working out a task in advance and feeling they could
do it if they needed to. For their neighbour, competence
means the whole task finished perfectly to the
satisfaction of someone else. Perhaps for one person,
recognition means a warm hand on the shoulder and a
heartfelt ‘thank you’ from their superior. For another, it
is a mention in the staff newsletter and a salary bonus.
Being loved for one partner in a marriage might mean
being told, for the other it may be loving touches and
caresses. - Secondly, what do others do that violates your values?
For some people dishonesty means stealing money, for
others it is telling lies. - Thirdly, how do you judge when you are acting from
your own values? We do not necessarily apply the same
rules to ourselves that we apply to others. - And lastly, how do we judge when we are acting against
our values?