The Art of Approaching

(Rick Simeone) #1

My buddy got to his feet. “You know what?” he said. “Ever since I got out here, you’ve
been in some kind of funk. I don’t know what’s going on with you, but maybe instead of
being miserable all the time, you should focus on feeling good about yourself, so you can
stop making everyone around you miserable too!”


With that, my friend turned and walked out the door.


So there I was, alone again. My brain was fuzzy, but I could still hear the words my
friend had spoken before he left. For some reason, I kept repeating them in my head,
over and over again, like a broken record...


“You should focus on feeling good about yourself, so you can stop making everyone
around you miserable too...”


I couldn’t get those words out of my head. As I looked around the bar, I watched the
guys who had girls around them. They were all laughing, drinking, having a good time,
and the girls around them were too.


And that’s when I finally understood what I had been doing wrong all this time.


My friend’s words had hit the nail on the head. Without knowing, he had just solved for
me my biggest problem.


Up to that point, all my lines, all my routines, all my efforts had gone towards trying to
make the woman I wanted attracted to me. I was trying to manipulate her feelings, get
her to experience what I wanted her to experience by leading her through thought
processes that were supposed to evoke certain emotions.


But trying to do this is like trying to make it rain by doing a rain dance. You can do the
steps perfectly, time and time again, but the sky will only rain when it’s ready to, no
matter how many rain dances you do.


The same is true of women. No matter how many lines, routines, or other things you run
on them, if they aren’t attracted to you, they just aren’t attracted to you!


Understand: You have no control over what other people think, feel, or do.


Sure, sometimes you can influence people to think, feel, and act a certain way. But it’s
their decision to do so, and they can accept or reject your influence at will.


When it all comes down to it, YOU are the only person you have complete control over.
YOU can determine how you think, feel, and act.


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