Chapter 7
Creating Rappor t
In This Chapter
▶ Getting people to listen to you in challenging situations
▶ Handling difficult people
▶ Improving your ability to say ‘no’
▶ Increasing your options in how you respond
▶ Gaining insights into other people’s experience
R
apport sits at the heart of NLP as a central pillar, or essential ingredi-
ent, which leads to successful communication between two individu-
als or groups of people. Rapport is a mutually respectful way of being with
others and a way of doing business at all times. You don’t need to like people
to build rapport with them. Also, rapport isn’t a technique that you turn on
and off at will, but something that should flow constantly between people.Rapport is like money: you realise that you have a problem only when you
don’t have enough of it. The first rule of communication is to establish rap-
port before expecting anyone to listen to you. And this rule applies to every-
body and in every situation, whether you’re a teacher, pupil, spouse, friend,
waitress, taxi-driver, coach, doctor, therapist, or business executive.Don’t kid yourself that you can pull rapport instantly out of the bag for a
particular meeting, conversation or problem-solving session. True rapport is
based on an instinctive sense of trust and integrity. This chapter helps you to
spot situations when you do (and don’t) have rapport with another person.
We share some special NLP tools and ideas to enable you to build rapport
and encourage you to do so with people where it may prove valuable for you.