Die-offs
“Unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it
bears much fruit.” John 12:24
“When we deny the urge toward transformative death it can only manifest covertly
through unconscious projection.” Uniting Sex, Self and Spirit, by Genia Pauli
Haddon.
“Whoever has studied the history of magic knows very well that in all epochs it has been
said that all great initiates remain dead for three days and resurrect on the third day.”
http://www.gnosis-usa.com/Lectures/kundalini2.html
The best definitions for stages of growth in consciousness that I have found are
Egg...Caterpillar...Pupae...Butterfly. This perfectly describes the stages, implications
and profundity of metamorphosis. As well as a rebirth, we also have to start seeing
metamorphosis as a process of progressive death...the caterpillar dies to its eggness,
the pupa dies to its caterpillarness, the butterfly dies to its pupaeness. My hope is
to clarify that dark nights, Die-offs and difficult kundalini symptoms and phases
are NOT in any way karmic punishment, but simply the metamorphic alchemy
at work in a completely natural and wholesome way, to bring about a new truly
human species.
FoUr tYPes oF DoWn triP
There are four main types of down-cycle events in metamorphosis that need to
be clearly understood to prevent unnecessary suffering and secondary backlash:
- liGHtninG: This is a terror event of intense energy pouring up the body
similar to a euphoric inner-conjunction, but in this case it is a dysphoric
inner-conjunction. Here it seems we descend deeply into our matter
and experience great fear with no apparent cause. This “negative” inner-
conjunction mostly occurs during one’s first awakening, as the polar flip to
the spontaneous bliss awakening in a neophyte-body that is unfamiliar with
such intensity of consciousness and energy. - sHocK: White Shock, or autonomic shock that occurs immediately
after mystic ecstasy or Sex with Eros. That is the contraction and toxic
overload after a significant opening to the extreme bliss of a euphoric inner-
conjunction event. - selF-DiGestion: Then there are the Die-offs which are a catabolic
breakdown of the former structures through apoptosis due to oxidation by
free radicals and then phagocytosis by the macrophages. - BUrnoUt: Lastly there is the exhaustion phase of the overall awakening
cycle where the body’s resources of neurotransmitters, hormones, and
nutrients have been used up in the climb to the heights of the awakening
peak. During exhaustion depression arises, yet there is permanent bliss giving
the sense of being dissociated from depression.