Friendship and Romance 113relationships. Despite falling under the same label, no two romantic relationships
are constructed in the same way, but instead are guided by the involved individu-
als’ overarching needs and goals (Sanderson, Keiter, Miles, & Yopyk, 2007). It is
possible to equally value all aspects of one’s romantic relationship (i.e., all of the
needs that the relationship could fulfill); nevertheless, often individuals value some
of the needs that a romance can fulfill to a greater extent than others (VanderDrift &
Agnew, 2012). Some individuals may prefer to task their romance with the fulfill-
ment of primarily sexual needs, for instance, whereas others focus more on friend-
ship aspects. Further differentiating romances from each other are the needs a
relationship is able to suitably fulfill, regardless of what the individuals involved
choose to task it with. Some romances, and indeed romantic partners, are more or
less suited to fulfill friendship needs, whereas others are better able to fulfill sexual
needs (VanderDrift & Agnew, 2012). Perhaps due to this variability, both in prefer-
ence and actual fulfillment of needs, the outcomes of romantic relationships differ
greatly as a result of the exact constellation of needs the relationship fulfills.
In this section, we review the importance of friendship- relevant needs to roman-
tic outcomes. To summarize the literature on friendship in romance, certain syn-
onyms of friendship must be considered. Definitions of friendship abound, but
most agree that it is characterized by the importance of affection, intimacy, relat-
able alliance, and instrumental and emotional support (Berndt, 2002). As such,
terms including “intimacy” and “companionship” are considered synonymously
with “friendship” in this chapter. This definition also suggests particular needs that
should be considered under the umbrella of “friendship needs.” There is a tradi-
tion of differentiating friendship needs from sexual needs in the literature. This
distinction, however, combines many aspects of nonsexual relationships together.
Autonomy and security, for instance, would be categorized as nonsexual and, thus,
classified as friendship needs. We argue that these needs differ from the definition of
friendship, and may more reasonably be considered personal and attachment needs,
respectively. We specifically focus on those needs that fit closely with the definition
of friendship: companionate needs, belonging needs, and affiliative needs.
The needs that align with the definition of friendship originate from separate
theoretical traditions, but share enough commonalities to be considered together.
Companionate needs originate in the literatures concerned with the experience of
love and emotion. Companionate love is a mild emotion, compared with the more
intense passionate love, and is felt as a combination of attachment, commitment,
and intimacy (Hatfield & Rapson, 1993). Companionate needs, then, are those
whose fulfillment provides the affection and intimacy that are only possible when
lives are entwined. Close friendships feature such interdependence. Belonging
needs are predominately discussed in the literature concerned with broader human
motivations. Within this perspective, humans have a fundamental need to form
meaningful connections with others, and this need drives much of human behavior.
Belonging needs, then, are those that originate from fundamental human tendencies