needhishelp.Idon'twanttoappeardemanding.
Answer:Whenamanhearsarequestfromhispartner,hetrustsshehasgoodreasonsforasking.Ifshe
giveshimalotofreasonswhyheshouldfulfillherrequest,hefeelsasthoughhecan'tsayno,andifhe
can'tsaynothenhefeelsmanipulatedortakenforgranted.LethimgiveyouagiftInsteadoftakinghis
supportforgranted.
Ifheneedstounderstandmorehewillaskwhy.ThenitisOKtogivereasons.Evenwhenheasks,be
carefulnottobetoolengthy.Giveone,oratmost,tworeasons.Ifhestillneedsmoreinformation,he'lllet
youknow.
STEP 2 :PRACTICEASKINGFORMORE(EVENWHENYOUKNOWHEMAYSAYNO)........................
Beforeattemptingtoaskamanformore,makesurehefeelsappreciatedforwhatheisalreadygiving.By
continuingtoaskforhissupportwithoutexpectinghimtodomorethanhehasbeendoinghewillfeelnot
onlyappreciatedbutalsoaccepted.
Whenheisusedtohearingyouaskforhissupportwithoutwantingmore,hefeelslovedinyourpresence.
Hefeelshedoesn'thavetochangetogetyourlove.Atthispointhewillbewillingtochangeandstretch
hisabilitytosupportyou.Atthispointyoucanriskaskingformorewithoutgivinghimthemessagethathe
isnotgoodenough.
Thesecondstepofthisprocessistolethimrealizethathecansaynoandstillreceiveyourlove.Whenhe
feelsthathecansaynowhenyouaskformore,hewillfeelfreetosayyesorno.Keepinmindthatmen
aremuchmorewillingtosayyesiftheyhavethefreedomtosayno.
It'simportantthatwomenlearnbothhowtoaskandhowtoacceptnoforan answer. Womenusually
intuitivelyfeelwhattheirpartner'sresponsewillbeevenbeforetheyask.Iftheysensethathewillresist
theirrequest,theywon'tevenbotherasking.Instead, theywillfeelrejected.He,ofcourse,willhaveno
ideawhathappened--allthishasgoneoninherhead.
Instep 2 ,practiceaskingforsupportinallthosesituationswhereyouwouldwanttoaskbutdon'tbecause
youfeelhisresistance.Goaheadandaskforsupportevenifyousensehisresistance;evenifyouknowhe
willsayno.
Forexample,awifemightsaytoherhusband,whoisfocusedonwatchingthenews,"Wouldyougotothe
grocerystoreandpickupsomesalmonfordinner?"Whensheasksthisquestion,sheisalreadyprepared
for himtosay no. Heis probably completely surprised because shehasneverinterrupted him witha