"Here are the personal qualifications which we require of
all applicants for this particular job."
It used to be that the way to succeed was to
dominate others, first to pressure, and more recently to
influence, people to do things your way.
Now, the way to succeed is to cooperatively
adjust to the requirements of those upon whom your
success depends. You adjust to the direction of their atten-
tion ... you adjust to the subject of their interests ... you
adjust to re-enforce their beliefs .. you adjust to satisfy
their desires.
Doesn't this make you a will-less, jellyfish of
a creature whose only desire is to please? Not at all! It
requires more will-power to relinquish your own demands,
than it does to try to cram them down somebody else's
throat-if you could. It requires more ability to smoothly
adjust, than it does to offenSively dominate-if you could.
It requires more intelligence to cooperate than to be ob-
structive-if you could.
Please note that the preceding statements are
followed by: "if you could". Because the fact is: YOU
CANNOT. When you are dealing with people upon whose
decisions your success depends: you cannot cram your
demands down their throats, you cannot offensively domi-
nate them, you cannot obstruct their chosen paths to their
goals. You cannot have your way, but you must adjust to
their way.
That does not mean that, once you are on the
team, once you are an insider, you cannot make construc-
tive suggestions. In fact, you'll be asked to-and expected