Daily Mirror - 26.08.2019

(Jeff_L) #1

(^8) DAILY MIRROR MONDAY 26.08.
DM1ST
[email protected]
@kevin_maguire
Stalking the corridors of power
KEVIN MAGUIRE
POINTS OF
DISORDER #
POINTS OF
DISORDER #
TEACHERS, nurses, cops
or a Brown Owl would be
suspended immediately
for consorting with a
convicted child rapist – so
why not shamed royal
Andrew Windsor?
The Duke of York
deserves to be cast out
over what we know, never
mind fresh accusations,
about the Buck House
playboy’s cosiness with
US sex trafficker Jeffrey
Epstein.
MPs must ignore
outdated conventions
shielding a Ruritanian
monarchy from public
scrutiny when Parliament
returns next week to ask
why “Randy Andy” is still
on the payroll and feted
by 33 “education and
skills” charities, many
involving young people.
NOMINATIONS are closed
for Shameless Privileged
Whiner of the Year after
Andrew Halls, head of
£22,000-a-year King’s
College, bleated Oxford
and Cambridge are
discriminating against
private pupils. If only.
Oxbridge shuts out
working and middle-class
kids by wasting 42% of
places on the affluent 7%
of a fee-charging sector.
The real scandal is so
much talent’s missed
when state-school kids do
better at uni than
privately hot-housed kids
with identical grades.
GOING UP
Peaky Blinders’
Tommy
Shelby for
becoming an
MP without
killing as many as
Tory austerity.
GOING DOWN
Lib Dumb huckster Jo
Swinson for pitiful
party posturing
making her
Johnson’s
cliff-edge
Brexit useful
idiot.
SPEAKER’S
CORNER
“I’m going to go and meet billionaire hedge fund managers and get a giant pot of cash
from them.” He who pays the piper calls the tune with No 10 hatchet man Dominic
Cummings’ boast demonstrating Boris Johnson heads a fatcat regime.
6
UNMASKING two far-right extremists
in the Royal Navy, including one poised
to serve with Trident nuclear-armed subs,
is another brilliant undercover operation by
anti-fascist group Hope Not Hate.
The so-called Identitarian Movement
penetrated is another treacherous mob of
angry, crazed white supremacists. Far-right
bigots are fast becoming as menacing as
militant Islamists.
6
HS2 is the new wind turbines for Tory
and Brexit party reactionaries who
can’t see beyond the end of their noses.
Green energy opposed by Colonel Blimps
now fuels 25% of electricity. Back in the
day, right-whinge conservatives against
vital new rail lines would’ve stuck with the
horse and cart instead of building the iron
horse.
»
I JUST read Julia Lovell’s The Opium War, on how Britain
bombarded China into addiction to boost traders peddling
the narcotic from India. My heart is with Hong Kong protesters
but my head understands Beijing resenting lectures by London.
6
INFERNOS devastating an
Amazon that’s the globe’s
lungs, producing a fifth of our
oxygen, underlines how we live in
a shared world and no country’s
an island. Take note, blinkered
nationalist Little Englanders.
puncturing Johnson’s pomposity in a
general election.
Yet there is no ignoring the
mounting frustration of
Labour voters at the party’s
failure to build consistent,
signifcant poll leads.
Until Brexit is nailed
down as a Right-wing
Tory scam by Johnson
and that Thatcher
fan-boy Nigel Farage



  • a couple of poshies
    who have financially
    prospered from selling a
    British exit from the EU
    that would cost working folk
    dearly – Labour risks paying
    a heavy electoral penalty.
    The PM telling porkies every time
    he opens his mouth is burping to hide
    unappetising facts by regurgitating
    pork pie exports to America when
    Trump’s price is buying the NHS.
    And if we leave Europe through a
    trade tax-imposing no-deal door, it
    will spell B. A. D. for our valuable car,
    aerospace, chemical and pharmaceu-
    tical industries.
    We don’t want a British Trump.
    What we need is honesty.


some of the people all of the time to
cling to high office.
The Selfservative PM employs
Trumpian demagoguery to lead
incited masses. Exploiting the justified
furies of working people trampled
down by Tory austerity and the casino
capitalism he champions, the liar in
Downing Street blames migrants and
Europe for economic and social
crimes committed by his own party
and ideology.
Jeremy Corbyn is capable of

ONE is an untrustworthy,
nasty, idle, incompetent,
self-serving congenital
liar, while the other is – oh,
actually the same.
The national humiliation of
Boris Johnson grinning
gormlessly at Donald
Trump, awaiting the order
to jump just so he could
beg “how high?”, was
falsely spun by Downing
Street as a special
relationship.
But a desperate Tory
Prime Minister who would
be out of his depth in a
shower tray would be
taken to the cleaners in any
trade deal with “America First” Trump.
The US reinforced to me the
foolishness, unpredictability and
toxicity of a President who mistakenly
thinks he is the Chosen One – despite
his popularity ratings being lower
than Barack Obama’s.
Trump is for the broth pot next year
unless the Democrats, Labour’s sister
party, beats itself.
Johnson is equally divisive, and this
pair of malevolent clowns are mali-
cious egomaniacs twisting to fool

Clowns Don & Boris


no laughing matter


plan, Johnson is a liar
not a fool and aware a
Halloween exit would be
an economic horror.
Corbyn will be herding
cats this week in
meetings with hissing
party leaders and MPs
against a chaotic
job-destroying Brexit.
Pawing for political advantage
and keener to save their own skins
than keep Britain in Europe,
Labour’s leader isn’t alone in being
unable to predict when and how this
crisis will end.

VOICE OF THE


Licence to


avoid truth


BORIS Johnson’s refusal to honour a Tory
pledge to continue free TV licences for
our over-75s reveals the miserable truth
behind his spending myths.
The illegitimate Prime Minister is passing
the buck by trying to blame the BBC when it
is his party ending a funding agreement intro-
duced by the Labour government.
Mr Johnson is a fake pretending he cares
while condemning 3.7 million pensioners to
find £154.50 each to watch television.
His bottling of a £745million TV licence test
serves to heighten suspicions that he is full of
empty promises. He claims to be splashing the
cash except, perhaps, he is just intending to
reward his rich friends.
Nothing he says can be trusted when he
claims a no-deal Brexit is “touch and go” after
insisting it was a million-to-one chance.
You can tell a lot about a person by the
company they keep and Johnson embracing
Donald Trump reminded us that lying is
something they have in common.


Abolish Lords


THE House of Lords is an arcane
monstrosity we can afford to do without.
Hereditary peers are a relic of the landed
toffs who lorded it over the downtrodden
masses for centuries.
Now is as good a moment as any to get rid
of these 92 elitists who pass laws without us
ever being able to vote for them.
One solution is to let them die out, by
abolishing the ability of sons of sons of sons of
sons to take a seat in the Lords whenever an
aristocrat goes to their grave.
We must consign these expensive dinosaurs
to the dustbin of history.


Bat’s our Ben


DAILY Mirror columnist Ben Stokes
raising England’s Ashes hopes from the
dead was a skilled, nerve-shredding
performance surely deserving of a Sports
Personality of the Year award.


Even those who think cricket is dull and
boring must have been bowled over by it.


CHAOS HELPING BOJO


PETTY political rivalries give
Jeremy Corbyn more chance
of assembling a coalition to
stop Brexitgeddon than
trigger a general election.
Charlatan Boris Johnson
can’t believe his luck when
Labour quislings, Lib Dem
chancers and Tory cowards
could keep an unelected
Prime Minister in power.
Jittery Johnson might call his
own contest, pitching himself as the
People versus Parliament, should
the Commons block a suicidal
no-deal Brexit. I suspect that’s his

COALITION BID
Jeremy Corbyn

HEALTH WARNING


..and at your age, with your heart, I
suggest you really shouldn’t be
watching cricket.. try ziplining, high
stakes poker or risky outdoor sex..
Free download pdf