Friendship and Romance 115persistence over time (VanderDrift et al., 2013). Similarly, those couples in which
both members report they feel companionate love for their partner (i.e., “friend-
ship love”; Kim & Hatfield, 2004), have higher relationship quality relative to those
who report different types of love, including “intuitive” or “secure” love (Hecht,
Marston, & Larkey, 1994).
Prior to making firm conclusions that friendship is vitally important to roman-
tic health, evidence that it is uniquely associated with these relationship outcomes
is necessary. That is, would valuing and achieving any aspect of the relationship
(e.g., the sexual aspect) yield the same benefits seen in studies of friendship? The
answer, simply, is no— friendship has unique effects. Results from prototype analy-
ses support that the friendship aspect of a relationship is rated as more central to
the definition of a romantic relationship and romantic love than are the sexual
aspects (Aron & Westbay, 1996; Regan, Kocan, & Whitlock, 1998). Additionally,
and interestingly, those individuals who place greater importance on passion do not
report a greater experience of passion than those who place a lesser importance on it
(Aron & Westbay, 1996). Further, a belief that passion is important is unassociated
with romantic relationship quality (Fletcher & Kininmonth, 1992). Finally, when
examining how valuing different aspects of the relationship impact relationship per-
sistence, one study found that 11% of those individuals in nonmarital romances
who say that their affiliative needs are the most important in their romance are
involved in a breakup over the subsequent 4 months, compared with greater than
20% of individuals who say other needs are more important (e.g., sexual, personal;
VanderDrift et al., 2013). In sum, a friendship between romantic partners is robustly,
uniquely associated with positive romantic outcomes.
W hy Is Friendship Particularly Beneficial to Romantic Dyads?
Throughout this chapter, we have highlighted many of the advantages of friend-
ship in the context of romance. After nearly three decades of scientific research on
this topic, it is noncontroversial to say that a good friendship shared between two
individuals makes a solid basis for a romantic relationship, and that good friends’
opinions help individuals make choices regarding their romance that yield posi-
tive outcomes. But why does friendship provide such distinct benefits, over other
important needs that individuals have fulfilled in their interpersonal relationships?
One reason has to do with the nature of interdependence itself. In interdependent
situations, individuals’ thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are impacted by another’s
and vice versa. In such cases, individuals are vulnerable, and as such, they seek
information about their interaction partners that tell them whether or not they are
safe in interdependence. This information is called symbolic outcomes (Rusbult &
Van Lange, 2003). Resting on the broader implications of interaction, symbolic
outcomes provide information regarding a partner’s dependability, willingness to
sacrifice on behalf of the individual, and readiness to be relied on for the fulfillment