Which Testing Tactic Is the Most Common?
Badgering, temper, threat, martyrdom, butter up, and physical tactics
are all methods children use to get their way with adults. And all
these tactics, except butter up, can also be used by kids to punish the
uncooperative adults who obstinately persist in refusing to give the
children what they want.
We have taken several surveys of parents and teachers, asking
which tactics they thought children used the most. Interestingly, both
groups of grown-ups always mention the same three: badgering,
temper, and—the overwhelming favorite—martyrdom.
You will also be interested to know that the most annoying
manipulative maneuver used by children is a tactic that combines two
of the three favorites. This tactic, which drives many parents
absolutely nuts, is a combination of martyrdom (4) and badgering (1).
The word describing it starts with the letter W. You guessed it:
whining!
What to Expect in the Beginning
As we mentioned before, once you start counting, the kids will fall
primarily into two categories: immediate cooperators and immediate
testers. If you’re lucky to have immediate cooperators, enjoy it! You
will feel more affectionate toward your children because they are
listening to you. You will want to have more fun with your kids, talk
with them, praise them, and listen to them. You will enjoy working on
building a good relationship. This good relationship, in turn, will
make counting (1) less necessary and (2) a lot easier when it is
necessary.
Immediate testers, however, get worse at first. When you let them
know you’re going to be the boss and you take away the power of