levels of attraction for her and so she would respond to him
as if he were about to marry her.
Within a month of her realization, she met Gus, who later
became her husband. Although she fell in love right away, she
wisely put her foot on the brake and went slowly. She was
careful to move through each of the five stages, and now she
is happily married. She is grateful for this insight and continues
to share it by teaching Mars/Venus workshops for singles.
EVERY RELATIONSHIP IS A GIFT
Every relationship is a gift. It offers us the opportunity to pre-
pare ourselves for finding and recognizing our soul mate. Each
time you choose to move through the five stages of dating with
a partner, you are increasing your ability to discern the right
person for you. Each time, you gain the ability to shoot your
arrow closer to the target. When a relationship ends, it is good
to take some time to reflect on the gift and then begin again.
When you feel grateful for something, then you are ready to
move on.
Even divorce can give us the gift of discernment. If we take
the time to be forgiving of our partner and forgiving of
ourselves for our mistakes, then our next relationship can bring
us closer to the mark. Through finding the gift or the good in
each relationship, we will eventually make our dreams come
true.
Cynthia was married four times before finding her soul mate.
In each of her marriages, she thought she was with her soul
mate. She so much wanted to find her soul mate that each time
she fell in love, she would assume he was the one. Eventually
she learned that love was not enough and that before assuming
a man was her soul mate, she would take
174 / JOHN GRAY, PH.D.