tion of love, but at the same time a woman must know that if
she denies herself to please him, it makes her less attractive.
No matter how happy she makes him, if she is editing herself,
holding herself back, and not expressing her true self, he will
eventually lose touch with his feelings of attraction for her.
What Men Love and What Is BoringA man loves it when a woman feels free to be herself in his
presence. From his perspective, her difference from him makes
her very attractive. Through being authentic, she can let her
feminine radiance shine and he is drawn to her like a moth to
the flame. He is turned on by her ease and comfort with herself
and her freedom of expression. When she can be herself in his
presence, that is a message to him that he doesn’t have to
change himself to be with her.
When a woman feels she has to become something other
than her true self to be lovable, then she becomes less attractive.
Not only does it restrict her true radiance, but it gives a mes-
sage that he is also expected to change in order to be acceptable.
THE SECOND ATTRIBUTE: RECEPTIVITY
The second attribute that makes a woman most attractive is
receptivity. Some woman are just able to flow through dating
situations, while others get rigid and stuck. This fluidity and
flexibility to flow around obstacles may be mistakenly viewed
as being too accommodating, but when it comes from recept-
iveness, it is very different.
When a woman is accommodating, she could be giving up
herself or what she wants in order to please a man. This trait
280 / JOHN GRAY, PH.D.