Body Language

If you want to kick-start a romance, arrange to meet your person of choice in

a dimly lit place. Both your and your partner’s pupils dilate because of the

lack of light, creating the impression that you’re interested in one another.

The rest is up to you.

For more information on what messages you can send with a gaze alone, go

to Chapter 5.

Progressing Through the Romance ...........................................................

The courtship procedure is made up of a series of stages, as explained in the

section, ‘Going courting: The five stages’ earlier in this chapter. In the early

stages of courtship a woman may position herself to indicate that she’s inter-

ested and available. A man may stroke a woman’s hand to show he wants

physical intimacy. Depending on how each person reacts to the other’s sig-

nals, the courtship progresses or comes to a screeching halt. If you find your-

self laughing, tickling, and generally engaging in playful behaviour when

you’re with Cute Guy or Gorgeous Gal, you know you’re at least ‘in like’ if not

yet ‘in love’ with one another. Goofing around and acting like puppies in a

basket is harmless, unthreatening behaviour that allows you to show one

another your nurturing and loving sides.

Chapter 13: Dating and Mating 227

Studying pupils

University of Chicago biopsychologist Eckhard

Hess developed pupillometrics to assess the

size of the eye’s pupil as a means of gauging

emotion or interest. Hess discovered that the

pupil enlarges when someone looks at some-

thing that stimulates him or her. When someone

looks at unpleasant or uninteresting things the

pupils contract. In one of Hess’s studies hetero-

sexual men were shown retouched pho-

tographs of women. In half the photographs the

women’s pupils were made to look larger, in the

other half the pupils were made to look smaller.

With few exceptions, the men perceived the

women with the larger pupils as being more

attractive and friendlier than the same women

whose pupils appeared smaller. When asked

why they found one set of women more attrac-

tive than the other the men were unable to give

an answer. None of the men remarked on the

difference in the size of the pupils.

Retouching photographs of male and female

models for print advertisements is common

practice. The pupils are enlarged to make the

models more attractive and alluring. Sales of

manufactured goods measurably increase

where close ups of the face are used to pro-

mote merchandise, especially in the worlds of

fashion, cosmetics, and hair products.