© 2003 – Carlos Xuma. – DD Publications – All Rights Reserved –
Unauthorized duplication or distribution is strictly prohibited. Visit http://www.datingdynamics.com for more information.your advances, you will give her the room she needs to breathe, think, and start to miss you.
Once you’ve established an initial attraction, and if you have been able to keep a good level of
trust without losing your mystery and challenge, a woman will want to find out more about you.
Very often, she just needs you to step back and let her know that you’re not going to run over
her. This will give her added comfort and trust in you, as well as demonstrating that you have
self-discipline and self-confidence. Only needy and insecure men overwhelm women with a
constant barrage of affection. You show your interest with hints, not beating her over the head.
If you’ve been dating a woman for a while and find that you have reached a stalemate,
where she appears to be resisting all further advances, your best bet is always a strategic
withdrawal. Take a step back and apply your self-discipline.
One Night Stands .............................................................................................................................
These have never really been a goal of mine, but I know that there are a lot of men who
don’t mind an occasional brief romp that doesn’t lead to a relationship. Guys are more
interested in quick sex, as a general rule. However, there are many women who want sex
without the commitment of a relationship. And, at some point in your dating life, you’ll probably
run into what I term the reverse-payback. Essentially, you get emotionally involved with a girl
you sleep with right off the bat, but as it turns out, she only wanted a romp in the hay, and she
promptly dumps you.
Sucks, huh? No one said life was fair. But it does go to show you that you don’t have to
be so worried that you’re this mean old “player” out there to hurt women. There is plenty of the
reverse situation going on out there, too.
If your target is to have fairly casual sex with no ties to any particular girl, then you’re
going to have to step up your energy – and your psychology. As I said, there are many women
who are interested in the same thing, but they still want the same primary elements that other
women want: attraction, trust, and respect. They just want them in different quantities.
In order for her to dive in to this with you quickly, you have to be very aggressive with
your teasing and your humor, as well as be willing to move forward with your progression much
quicker. You’ll want to go from wherever you are to more private surroundings as quickly as
possible. The secret is to get them isolated so you can work with her one-on-one. You start by
getting her away from other friends, then into a surrounding away from all other people. This
has to be done in parallel with your intensification of your approach.
The ideal candidates for one-night stands are women who you have an instant chemistry
with. Things just “click,” and you’re able to move ahead much faster than with a woman who has
setup a lot of the roadblocks to your seduction. These women aren’t “easy” by any means,
they’re just ready for you. Every so often, these people come along and we can’t deny our gut-
level attraction. Now, remember that these women are on the far side of the spectrum, the one
that goes from “super easy” to “super frigid.” You still have to exercise caution and self-
discipline along the way.
Handling a one-night stand is entirely up to you and your needs. I have known many
people who started a good short-term romance from a one-nighter. Although you should
observe that it is difficult to transition from a brief sexual fling into a more secure relationship,
since you will have put the cart before the horse, so to speak. The foundation of most short- to