© 2003 – Carlos Xuma. – DD Publications – All Rights Reserved –
Unauthorized duplication or distribution is strictly prohibited. Visit http://www.datingdynamics.com for more information.Great, another guy who worships me and wants to have sex. Just like
the last one. This isn’t challenging at all. Well, at least I’ll get dinner out
of it. Ewww, what do I do if he wants to kiss me?Hmmm. He’s nice, but he’s so hard to read. I wonder what he’s thinking? I
wonder what he thinks about ME? Is he attracted to me? I wonder if he likes
my body ... I wonder if he’s a good kisser... I wonder ...Also, at the very start, keep your touching to a minimum. Let her come on to you. If you
show too much physical affection too soon, she’ll start to feel smothered. Ever had a girl who
clings on you like Velcro? Remember how it made you want to pull away and run for your life? It
works the same for her. The less you touch her, the more she will want to touch you. When you
do, it will be more inviting and satisfying.
You will also keep your references to sex to a minimum. All too often a guy will start
bringing up sex as if this was all a woman was waiting to hear to get hot and jump him. She will
not respond to your desire for her with more desire for you. However, she will respond to your
absence of obvious desire as doubt, and that will motivate her to validate if you are interested.
If she jokes about sex, you need to turn it around into her coming on too strong – jokingly. Do
the gender role reversal. She’ll get even more challenged.
If you come on strong, she thinks:If you come on light and mysterious she thinks:What you don’t tell her in words or obvious action, she doesn’t know. What she doesn’t
know translates into a need to know more. Conversely, what she does know translates into not
needing to do anything or wonder anything. She won’t be reaching for you. Make sense?
Avoid the Premature “I Love You” ....................................................................................................
There is a temptation to put these three words out there far too early. I’ve been guilty of
it, too. Something I learned early on was that the longer you wait to say this, the better off you
are. I won’t go into esoteric discussions of what love is or when it happens, but suffice to say
that it usually doesn’t happen for a long time. There is no “love at first sight,” only lust at first
sight that actually turns into something long-term.
The best rule of thumb is that a man who says this too soon is no challenge, and is
basically wearing his heart on his sleeve. Avoid saying it during sex, as it tends to be said too
freely. Do not pledge your love in words or writing for at least three months. I hesitate to say
that you should wait longer, if at all possible. And never say it if you don’t mean it.