Attached

for you, stop and think. Is this actually a deactivating strategy? Are all those small imperfections you’re starting to notice r ...

may not be an easy task, but with practice and perseverance, you’ll gradually get the hang of it. Take time every evening to thi ...

7. Getting Comfortably Close: The Secure Attachment Style Writing about people with a secure attachment style seems like a borin ...

styles. Patrick Keelan, as part of his doctoral dissertation at the University of Toronto, conducted a study to test this issue. ...

fit almost every description across the personality spectrum: Aaron, 30, a chemical engineer, is an introvert with a strong dis ...

Stan was. If he had attacked her out of the blue, she’d have struck back and World War III would have broken out. She wouldn’t h ...

more nervous as a result, as measured by skin conductance tests (which measure the amount of sweat on the skin). Remarkably, tho ...

are confident in their positive beliefs about themselves and others, which makes this assumption logical. Responsible for their ...

would carry this confidence into adulthood and future relationships with romantic partners. Does the evidence support these pred ...

and in adulthood, it is weak at best. So where does the secure attachment come from? As more studies become available, there is ...

Be available: Respond sensitively to their distress, allow them to be dependent on you when they feel the need, check in with t ...

IT’S NOT ME; IT’S YOU—CHOOSING A PARTNER If you have a secure attachment style, you know how to sidestep many of the obstacles t ...

more secure attachment style are indeed less likely to play games. Tanya knows intuitively which partners are wrong for her. Gam ...

Never taking blame for a date’s offensive behavior. When a partner acts inconsiderately or hurtfully, secures acknowledge that ...

Campbell and Carol Wilson—found that during the shift into parenthood, anxiously attached women were more likely to move toward ...

people with a secure attachment style view their partners’ well-being as their responsibility. As long as they have reason to be ...

If you’re still in the relationship, remember that just because you can get along with anyone doesn’t mean you have to. If you’r ...

PART THREE When Attachment Styles Clash ...

8. The Anxious-Avoidant Trap When the two people in a couple have colliding intimacy needs, their relationship is likely to beco ...

When viewed in this light, we can see that the washing machine dispute is only a symptom of the real issue—the fact that Mark an ...