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page_68 Page 69 second reaction is to holler some more. It comes naturally. Reacting that way appears to be easier than leaving ...

unimportant) to you rejects you or your choices, you are still real, and you are still worth every bit as much as you would be i ...

of problems. We may stay so busy reacting we never have the time or energy to identify the real problem, much less figure out ho ...

Go through the previous steps on detachment for whatever or whoever is bothering you the most. If you need to talk to someone s ...

We control because we don't think. We control because controlling is all we can think about. Ultimately we may control because t ...

she had created. In spite of her determined and desperate efforts, her husband still found opportunities to drink. He found ways ...

me from leaving. You know just what I want to hear, and that's what you tell me. But you never change. You've never intended to ...

page_81 Page 82 I heard some wisdom on detachment out of the mouths of babesmy babies. Sometimes, my youngest son, Shane, hangs ...

Page 84 around us. As codependents, we may do many things, but this pattern is what we do best and most often. This is our favor ...

temporarily. I am not referring to acts of love, kindness, compassion, and true helpingsituations where our assistance is legiti ...

Let me illustrate a rescue. A friend of mine was married to an alcoholic. Whenever he got drunk, she would drive all over town, ...

Caretaking doesn't help; it causes problems. When we take care of people and do things we don't want to do, we ignore personal n ...

Many codependents have been taught other ways to be caretakers. Maybe someone taught us these lies, and we believed them: don't ...

I believe God wants us to help people and share our time, talents, and money. But I also believe He wants us to give from a posi ...

changed the system, rocked the boat. It means more work for them, and they can't use you anymore. Explain to them what you are d ...

I am not saying codependents are peculiar ducks because they want and need love and approval. Most people want to be in a love r ...

we acknowledge and meet our healthy, natural needs for people and love, yet we don't become overly or harmfully dependent on the ...

draining relationshipthese signs of helplessness are characteristic of women who are psychologically dependent. 5 Why do we do t ...

Here are some ideas that may help: Finish up business from our childhoods, as best as we can. Grieve. Get some perspective. Fig ...

night. She didn't cause any serious problems. She seemed to be looking for something, trying to fill her empty hours. The child ...